It's OK to Eat Poop - No Really, The Government Says It's OK

Title 21, Code of Federal Regulations, Part 110.110 allows the Food and Drug Administration (FDA) "to establish maximum levels of natural or unavoidable defects in foods for human use that present no health hazard". The FDA set these "maximum levels" of "defects" because, in their words, "it is economically impractical to grow, harvest, or process raw products that are totally free of non-hazardous, naturally occurring, unavoidable defects".

According to the FDA guidelines, "defects" can refer to, but are not limited to, the following examples:

• Copepods and Pus Pockets in Red Fish and Ocean Perch Fillets - The maximum allowable limit is 3% of the fillets examined contain 1 or more copepods accompanied by pus pockets.
• Rodent Hairs in Apple Butter - An average of 4 rodent hairs per 100 grams of apple butter is "acceptable".
• Insect Filth in Peanut Butter - An average of 30 insect fragments PLUS an average of 1 rodent hair per 100 grams is allowed.
• Maggots in Canned Mushrooms - An average of not more than 20 maggots of any size per 100 grams of drained mushrooms and proportionate liquid OR an average of not more than 5 maggots 2 mm or longer per 100 grams of drained mushrooms and proportionate liquid.
• Mammalian Excreta in Whole Black Pepper - An average of not more than 1 mg of mammalian excreta is allowed per pound.

What is the Difference Between a Blimp and 16,500 Condoms?

Obviously - One is a Goodyear and the other is a GREAT year.

Recently, the scientific base in Antarctica received a shipment of 16,500 condoms (apparently, a year's supply) for the 125 scientists stationed there. That works out to a whopping 264 condoms per couple. Apparently there is not a whole lot of scientific research going on down there.

Trivia of Note:

• There are currently three GZ-20A size Goodyear blimps in service: the Spirit of Goodyear based in Akron, Ohio; the Spirit of Innovation based in Pompano Beach, Florida; and the Spirit of America based near Los Angeles.
• Each Goodyear blimp is 192 feet long, 55 feet in diameter, and 59.5 feet high, with 202,700 cubic feet of helium and a gross weight of 12,840 lbs.
• There are 7,560 custom made high brightness LED's (light emitting diodes) on the side of each of the Goodyear blimps.
• Goodyear has owned as many as eight blimps at a time since its first commercial ship, the Pilgrim, flew in 1925.
• Goodyear blimps are made of polyester fabric coated with neoprene rubber. They look shiny and metallic from a distance, but they are actually soft and flexible. Condoms are usually made of latex or polyurethane (and are also soft and flexible).
• There is also now a female condom, or vaginal sheath, which is used by a woman and which fits inside her vagina.

Unfortunately Ford Does Not Offer a Lawn Mowing Attachment For the Explorer

According to Environmental Elements ECO Mowers, "the average gasoline powered mower tested by the EPA emits in 1 hour of operation the same amount of hydrocarbons that a 1992 Ford Explorer emits over 23,600 miles".

If you don't want to risk the neighbors calling the city code enforcement goons to come and strong arm you into cutting your waist-high weeds BUT you also don't want to contribute unduly to the extinction of polar bears, you may want to consider purchasing a manual-powered or electric lawn mower (at least until Ford comes out with a grass cutting attachment for the Explorer).

Trivia of Note:

• According to the Environmental Protection Agency, 7% of all summertime emissions of volatile organic compounds (VOC's) in southeastern Wisconsin are produced by lawn and garden equipment.
• Because electric power plant emissions are strictly regulated and controlled, a typical electric lawn mower produces less than one percent of the smog-contributing carbon monoxide that a gas mower puts out and 1/9000th of the hydrocarbons.
• In Britain, about 70% of lawn mowers sold are electric.